Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Stranger Danger Reality Check

I honestly figured that as soon as I would begin a blog, my life would become extremely clear of all adventure, fun, and anything worth writing about. Only to realize a few days later that wasn't the case because,... 
  1. My life was becoming more eventful(and not just because the holiday season is around the corner.)
  2. Almost anything is something to write about.
Luckily, life decided that since I'm just beginning my blog, it would go easy on me and hand me something to talk about. YAY :)

On Friday night, Brenden and I decided to go on a date. We hadn't really gone on one since our anniversary in August, so I was a little desperate for some out of the house, without pajamas, mommy and daddy time. I am literally losing all my color, summer glow=GONE so it was definitely necessary.
I would put a picture of my LOVELY vampire looking skin here but obviously it's not so flattering. :(

We were planning on going to the movies, but as many people don't know with newborns, TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE. You have a tiny little window in which you can be completely ready to leave the house before the baby gets hungry again, or he sh*ts his pants, or he just DOES NOT want to be in the car seat any longer waiting on anybody. Since I don't want to sound like I'm still upset about this, because I'm not, I will leave out the gruesome details that would reflect negatively upon a very wonderful person. Everyone messes up. Things happen and we must usually be forgiving, and move on. The 3 of us(Brenden, Jude, and myself) ended up leaving Brenden's house at 9:30. By the time we got to my sister's house to drop off Jude it was already 10:20 and our plans to go to the movies had been foiled! Damn.(By the way, why would a movie theatre show opening movies at midnight but stop showing all other movies around 10 on any other day?!?!?!.) 

Soon after we noticed there was NO way we would catch any movie on time we rearranged our plans and ended up at IHOP, where our friend Christian works. We got a booth in his section and waited. Randomly, this extremely tall and really intimidating blonde woman walked in asking for a quiet booth with an electrical outlet carrying this"If you don't like me, EFF YOU" vibe on her face. Yes, her face. I could tell she came here often because she knew the workers by name and her order was shamelessly intricate. I did people watch her a little, but something about her was really interesting in my defense!!!! Eventually I worked up the courage to ask her what she was doing and if she went there often, her response being that she found it easier to work and study at IHOP with minor distractions like Facebook(that she could control) and dumb teenage kids yelling(which happened to be my friends haha) than to work at home with her bed just calling to her. Beds are truly evil captors that like to enslave humans with their comfortable pilllowy goodness. Such a GENIUS idea! (She turned out to be...not so genius.)

We started talking and I learned she had a bunch of degrees in all this stuff and nothing to show for it but a job at U of H that pays her practically nothing. She asked what I wanted to do with my life and what I wanted a career in, "Criminal Justice,"I responded. Only to have her completely shoot down my dreams and give me the most negative reality check ever. She said it would be NOTHING like T.V., which I knew but I sort of hoped it would be exciting at times. She totally crushed my hopes when she reminded me that I'm puny compared to most criminals and others in the force, and that absolutely no one would take me seriously. Also letting me know I probably wouldn't want to try and take down guys twice the size of me. Now. While this is true, this lady just KILLED my dream. She took me from my wonderful self confidence cloud and staked me to the ground with her super cold words. Woe...is me(at this point.)
She suggests I stay away from men dominant fields and go into a field which women excel in, such as...YOU GUESSED IT, nursing. She says that going into a field dominated by men I will only be trampled by...men. I know that not everyone gets to do something amazing, and that not everyone beats the odds and does something really cool like be the only woman in a badass office and happens to be in charge of quite a few things(which I am proud to say my sister is! Congrats Mia <3) but even if you are trying to help me by telling me what won't benefit me, how dare you try to stop someone who wants to do something great with their lives? Even if I'm unsure I'll be a detective some day, the only way for one of us "less dominant" beings to break the ice and succeed in a man dominant field is to go for it. I don't know if I will or won't, because once I go into college, my opinion may change and I may want to work in a different field.

There's a reason we have hopes and dreams, and that's to fuel us into the future. If we have nothing to look forward to, we become lazy and quit reaching for the stars. I guess this leads me to my point: real family is THE greatest creation ever. No matter how much they may think you might not succeed, they'll keep you believing in yourself and what you aspire to be. Family gives you reality checks, but they don't crush your dreams and they only help you to get to where you want to be. As real as this lady(whose name I do not know) was with me about what I want to be, it's not something to tell a dreamer with a family who would help her move a mountain. I want to thank my mommy for never telling me I couldn't do something and always expecting the best of me, because she knew it was what was best FOR me. Because of my family, this lady who's clearly been effed over by the world will not influence my choices in my educational career. 


Love all, 
Anabee<3

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Land of Change, Land of New.

So, never in my life did I imagine I would be where I am. I didn't think I would be a teenage mom, I didn't think I'd be with Brenden( I promise to elaborate! It isn't a bad thing that I didn't think this!), I didn't even think I'd be in the United States for the rest of my life until I was 7. Before then, I was going to live in Venezuela, go to school in Venezuela, make a life in Venezuela, be Miss Venezuela(shucks!), marry in Venezuela, and ultimately, meet my calm death there in my sleep. I know it sounds silly that I pictured my whole life in great detail as a five year old, but I'm sure I added some of these things on as I grew. Since I was only 5 when I left, I became "americanized."


My journey has been complicated, it has been challenging, and it has been chaotic, but it has been wonderful and simple as well. I'm not rich, I'm not poor, and I'm grateful for the little things every day. 
My mom being a creep in the background and
Mia, Elia and I having fun with my mac!
I think of myself as a pretty wise person. I have made some bad and untimely decisions, but at the end of the day I can say I took responsibility for my actions and learned from them. I have matured more than most people do in less than a year. Thanks to my family and friends, I'm the type of person I aspired to be! I am in love with my family and I would not be who I am without them, I know a lot people say this and it's a total cliche, BUT I honestly mean it. My mother, the most wonderful(she has her days too...) lady in the world, made my childhood the greatest she could no matter the circumstances. My sisters, Mia and Elia, or my mini mommies, have been the best support system I could have asked for! 
Throughout the years, the 4 of us have become very strong and independent women! Our family has grown!


While the entire family has grown, I have formed a small one of my own. It was a premature choice but I love them more than anything and I honestly hope we can charge forward and succeed as a loving caring family. NO more additions for now :)


To introduce everyone in the castle!
Me! Ana
  
Brenden; the boyfriend, Baby<3( I never imagined I'd be with you
 for the rest of my life, nor did I think we would date for long, 
but I fell in love with you, and I enjoy practically every second I'm with you.
 You are my bestfriend, my partner in crime. I can't imagine my 
or Jude's life without you! I love to see you come over after work or 
to wait for you at your house. You have made me one happy girl, love!
 You are an awesome daddy and I see your love for Jude grow everyday.
 I don't think there's anyone I have this much fun with. We have cried 
and we have laughed, but our love strengthens through it all)

Jude; my son, Juju( I fell in love with you the first time
 I layed eyes on you, and I love you more and more everyday.
 You make me smile more than anyone ever has.
Seeing you grow up has been beautiful, crazy, and a little saddening
 and I can't believe you aren't gonna stop!
I'm so glad to be your mommy, bug! I aspire to be
the best mom you could possibly have and raise you
as a fine young man like your cousins Sean and Colin.
 You are my world babybug.)


Elia I; the mami, T-lady, Nonna( Mami, I finally understand a mother's love,
 and it makes me extremely happy to have had you with me
 while I was becoming a mother. I see how much you love me and
 how important your children are and have been to you. You have been 
through so much and you still have hope for better, YOU ARE AMAZING.
 I couldn't have chosen a better mother for myself ;) I love you so much
 and I'm sorry for taking the last year of my childhood from you 
and attempting to grow up so fast. This picture of you makes me REALLY happy!)

Jared; brother in law, Daddy J, Boo(You have become a true
brother to  me through the years you've been with Elia,
we may not be related by blood but you are one of the best
big brothers I could have been given, Thanks Elia!
 You and Wes became sort of my father figures
and I'm glad I'm very close to ya'll! Our relationship is very simple and I love it!
 I can go to you for help with everything and like Elia, you're my mentor.
Our bonding time is really fun Boo! You give me a lot to think about and for that
 I thank you. You put into questions alot of things that most people don't,
 it's makes you a good role model! Beard and all!
I feel so comfortable talking to you about
anything and I think you are an amazing daddy!)


Elia II; sister, Nena(My mentor! My best friend! You have talked me 
through so much, you have been my guide waiting for me 
at every corner! Ever since I was little wittle, you have been
 a mini mommy to me, and I think that's why you're so great 
with Camila. I am so proud of you for leading the life you wanted to.
 You are such a strong woman with some giant ovaries! 
You make me want to better myself everyday, and
 you were one of the ones supporting me to get my GED. 
Best decision ever. I thank you for being such a wonderful sister.
 You are the sticky glue that holds the 4 of us girlies
 together and you advocate for us all.)

Camila; my niece, Elia and Jared's spawn, Camiluza( I  honestly 
don't see you often my pretty princess, but I have never
 loved a baby girl as much as I love you. I CANNOT
 wait until you and Jude are old enough to play together 
because I know ya'll will be inseparable. Seeing your pictures 
on El Localito makes me so happy! You are beautiful!
 I also can't wait to spoil you bunches while your mommy 
and daddy aren't watching!)

Maria; sister, Mia, Mamma Mia(You are one more mother
for me, and I love you so much, I don't think you even
know. As much as you might disapprove I look up to you,
as a woman and as a mother. I know we have our days and
our arguments but you keep me in check. I have loads of fun
with you and anytime you laugh at something I say
I feel accomplished to have made the queen of jokes laugh. As
 one of my bestfriends, I tell you everything and anything.
You're my vent,as much as I am yours. I don't
care how nervous you may be, because I still see you as a
brave person who took charge of her life after others
wanted to mess it up, and although it was challenging,
you did it. I am so proud to say you're my big sister.)
Wes; brother in law, Puffin, Wessy( Lately I haven't been able to
hang out with you or watch movies with you but I'm so close to you.
 I'm happy you came into our lives, and it meant so much to me that
even through the hard times you were determined to stay in mine.
You and Jared are the best big brothers for me and anytime someone
asks about my siblings, ya'll are including as well. I have seen you
grow up! I saw you go from teenage boy playing with sister's heart a bit
 to grown man treating his wife like a queen and his boys like little princes.
I am so amazed at how much you have changed Wessy!
You are a great father and husband and I'm so thankful that God
gave me a brother like you.)
Colin; my nephew, Coli Coli, Coco, Coco loco, Woody,
 Batman, Red Power Ranger, you get the point... haha( My little Coco,
you are my baby brother! You light up my day with your smile and voice.
You may be SUPER picky when choosing clothes and shoes, but
it's what makes you, you. You're a lovely boy and I'm glad to
be the auntie of such a cute and creative person! You and Sean
make me so happy! I am so anxious to see the person you grow up to be
, because you are a wild little monkey right now, with lots of love!
 I love you so much Colin! Whenever you need me, I will be right here!)
Sean; my nephew, Mia and Wes' first spawn,
Seanybunny, Thor, Buzz, etc.( Seany, Seany, Seany. You
are so special to me baby boy! You were my first nephew
and honestly, I see you like my little brother. You and Colin
are the funnest little brothers! I remember seeing
 you for the first time and how much I loved you!
 You are such a wonderful young man and I cannot believe
 how fast you're growing up. I think you are extremely talented
with those legos and you'll go very far in life, not necessarily just with legos.
 You are one of the sweetest boys in the world and
 I wish for nothing more but to be in your life and guide you
when you need me. I may see you as my brother,
but I am also your auntie! Your smile is beautiful.)

I hope to write enjoyable stories about our family adventures, we'll see how this experiment goes... 


Love all! Anabee






Sunday, March 7, 2010

Looking back

I'm sure that I will look back at this later on and say, "Oh how young and naive I was" but this is all about how I feel at the time. I have many things to say about life, and I am young and naive, but who cares? I have a mind and a voice. I have a story worth being heard and maybe I will learn something from this.